Divorce does not have to be confrontational. Many couples are committed to ending their marriage with as little conflict as possible. Even with considerable bitterness, a couple can often put those feelings aside to finalize their divorce quickly and inexpensively.
Mediation is a form of alternative dispute resolution that many spouses use to help them resolve their differences and achieve a divorce settlement. A New Canaan mediation lawyer can facilitate discussions about relevant issues, help you find areas of agreement, and build consensus from there. Call our law office today to speak with an experienced family attorney.
Mediation is a facilitated conversation between two parties who are in conflict. Divorce mediation helps spouses reach agreements concerning property division, child custody and support, spousal support, and any other issues they must resolve to complete their divorce.
A mediation lawyer in New Canaan has special training in conflict resolution techniques. They do not represent either party or offer legal advice, although they will educate the parties about legal requirements that apply to a specific dispute. The mediator is neutral, and their job is to facilitate discussions that can lead to agreements.
When mediation is successful, the mediator will formalize the parties’ agreements in writing. Each spouse should have their attorney review the agreement before they sign it. When both spouses sign the mediated agreement, it is submitted to the court for approval and will be incorporated into an enforceable court order.
Mediation is unlikely to be successful unless both spouses genuinely want to resolve their dispute without taking the divorce to trial. When one spouse needs to be correct, refuses to listen to the other, or is unwilling to compromise, mediation often fails to produce an agreement.
Sometimes, couples genuinely want to resolve their differences, but their communication styles conflict. Mediation requires each spouse to state their position and listen as the other spouse states theirs. Couples who rely on sarcasm or putdowns, talk over each other, or cannot listen to each other may not find mediation helpful.
Additionally, a history of domestic violence or a significant power imbalance may disqualify a couple from mediation. Some mediators will not accept a couple in these circumstances; others may meet with the spouses separately to ensure both can state their positions without fear. Mediators may conduct the sessions remotely so that the spouses are not physically close to each other.
Spouses with respectful relationships, good communication, and confidence in each other’s integrity may want to consider mediation before initiating a divorce. By resolving their outstanding issues before filing, they can take advantage of an expedited process and save time and legal fees.
However, filing for divorce offers the spouses protections that are unavailable beforehand. When the couple files, a court will issue orders to preserve the status quo until the divorce is final, preventing either spouse from wasting marital assets. The divorce proceedings also require each spouse to disclose their financial holdings; the other spouse’s legal team will often verify those disclosures.
When couples wait to mediate their differences, they have the protection of the court’s orders and the spouse’s disclosures to support their negotiations, and they do not have to rely on the honor system.
Whenever there is a question about whether one spouse might take financial advantage of the other or hide assets, discuss it with a mediation lawyer in New Canaan before the first session. In those cases, delaying mediation until the discovery process is complete is often advisable.
Mediation can be an empowering, cost-effective, and speedy way to settle a divorce. However, it is not the right tool for everyone, and there are risks.
Talk with a New Canaan mediation lawyer about your situation. They can explain the advantages and disadvantages, and you can decide whether it is right for you.